I’ve been feeling stuck, creatively. Uninspired, the writing hasn’t been flowing, everything seems wrong. I’m judging things I write or have written, I have no energy, the passion is gone. Even my Photo-a-Day project has felt stagnant lately. I’m just stuck.
I posted on twitter and asked fellow writers what they do, and only got one response – he said to talk a walk, get out with other people and get away from the screens. So I did that. Yesterday, Little Man and I went to the Queens Zoo, which is a good 15 minute walk from here, and looked at all the farm animals (note: The Queens Zoo has two parts, the zoo part which has big cats, coyotes, birds, etc. And the farm side which has cows, pigs, sheep, chickens, etc). My son loved the ducks this trip and we spent quite a bit of time just watching them swim, waddle, fly, and sleep.
The walk helped, actually, and once my son was napping I worked on two scenes of my revision and felt okay. Then this morning happened. I didn’t get enough sleep, was awake at all hours with a toddler who had a nightmare, apparently, and wouldn’t go back to bed and I felt groggy. So….I wrote three bad poems while I ate breakfast. Yup…I wrote poetry. I don’t write poetry, so that’s why I’m calling it bad – it is, but it was fun and I enjoyed working on these three short pieces. I need to allow myself to play more, and not the kind of playing that I do with my son (blocks for the win!) but creatively playing. Bad poems, doodles and drawings, singing something other than The Wheels on the Bus, creative photographs, playing around with my photo editing apps on my phone – I need to play more. I need to allow myself to fail and try and not give up in other areas of my life.
So…without much more explanation, three bad poems:
Sweet liquid in my mug
Cream and sugar best of friends
Swirled ‘round and ‘round
Some mornings, gives me courage
Champion, ready to take on the world
Soothing elixir, chasing away nightmares
Charging forward into my day
Popular, pretty people who pin trendy clothes
Images from strangers, friends, exes, and enemies
Neon lights glow bright – New York and Tokyo
Too many recipes, too many movies, too many books
Exercise restraint – don’t pin too much, ignore
Retreat to a safe haven, the geek board
Everyone can have a piece
Sinful, chocolate, salted caramel delights
Tasty celebrities, artsy black&white, full color photographs
Tall and strong, trying to be independent
Sweet, affectionate, stubborn, and full of personality
I see so much of myself in you.
I see so much of your father, too.
Little man who plays so hard
Exploring, learning, growing up so fast.
Still, you love to climb up in my lap
Rest your head upon my shoulder.
Still my baby
Always and forever.